Geez...it's been a while now since I posted.  I am reminded that I should but it seems like in the past couple of weeks it's been hard to find the energy to do so.  I think about everything that has happened in the past what is now a little more than 2 weeks and the changes in how I feel about myself and what I think about the situations I have and am in and how I will deal with it all.
My trip back from Las Vegas was gut wrenching.  I had to say good bye for the first time, of what will be many, to my Daddy.  That night as I packed my things for the flight so early the next day I was overwhelmed by the connection I had made with Him.  I removed my collar and carefully put it in my luggage (the things we must go through now since 911) and closed everything up.
When I landed and went to get my bag, it wasn't there and didn't arrive with the next flight either.  The only thing I thought about was my collar and my connection to my Daddy and feeling a loss inside that I didn't know I would feel.
I drove all the way home, and the next evening after tracking it down, my bag arrived at my house and I retrieved the collar and held onto it and felt so much better.
This journey I am on has led me to so many friends who I feel connected to even though they are far away and over the past week I've been able to reach out to them for advise, or just to answer curious questions I have about this path that they have taken before me.
Again I was overwhelmed when I was told "you are part of a family now" I just sort of froze for a moment.  While I was aware of the "leather family", to be told I was part of it churned up so many feelings inside, and I knew that the connection I had with my Daddy and Bear Eagle was more than I could ever put words to.

Well today I sit in the airport waiting for my flight to Vegas where I will get to see my Daddy.  I need him right now, it's been a really bumpy road lately and the time with Him will be good.  We will talk, we will play, He will help me to understand and deal with everything that has been bombarding me.  It will be a good time for us.